Hello,
first of all, I would like to say sorry for my English. It's still not the best, but I hope that during writing this blog and my studies I'll be better every day :)I also want to say that it's a blog of me and my life. And because BDSM is a big part of my life, many things will be about it. The blog is translation of blog I have in my own language.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Present for Master

How you already got know, recently I threw the book at my Master. I talked back so much, that I feel ashamed, when I think about it. I wouldn't even tell that woman, who's learning how to be a slave for so long already, could do stuff like that. But you know how it's working - PMS and stuff like that - Master throw the spark, and the slave stir the fire. And definetly it's not the fire of marbles.

Because yesterday my Owner made me realise that he wouldn't punish me that day, I decided that within the scope of compensation I would prepare him a surprise. Especially that recently we didn't have enough time to spend with each other, and He missed my body and moment to enjoy me to the full. According to that I prepared all stuff which He might like to use on me: our both whips, paddle, clasps, butt-plug, blindfold and the rest of our stuff. Even when I took a look in that side of our room I was stressed. I definietly wasn't in THE mood and my whole-hurting body and being mad because of PMS was making it even worse. Yes... Definietly it wasn't my day.

And I was waiting for Him. And waiting... And keep waiting. When you're waiting, minute are passing cruely slow and seconds become a eternity. At least - with hands in front of me and sticked out - I waited long enough. The sound of key in lock brought almost shaking each muscle of my body. My Master went into our place and in His normal pace was doing stuff, which you need to do when you're coming back home. For me it was like another eternity. Only I got was short "hello".

Then, He asked me to stand up and hugged me soo stron. Who other knows me the best and could know that this is what I need at that very moment. Only He could - my Master and Owner. When He was already clean and well-smelling, He made me to kneel in front of his legs, and - from time to time - touching my face, he started to talk. To talk about situation, which require to be solved and that I will be punished because of that; that I can't talk to him in the way I did yesterday, definietly not as His slave; that I didn't solved each task from my to-do-list and that he want to ejoy me to the full and when He would do that, then I would be punished for all what I did.

- Do you know, that what will happend in the moment won't be neighter pleasing nor light?

He didn't make me feel better with that, but I was His gift and surprise so I was for Him, and how He will use that gift... I had nothing to do with that decision.

It have been started quite drastic. Clasps on my labias (those tinier) is something which I wasn't able to take. At least it is what I thought. But, as usual - He knows me better. He knew that I can endure that. And I did. The further we got, the worse it was getting to be. Clasps on my nipples, deep throat, in which I'm still not the best ( and btw I hate that name). I achieved more that ever...
I mastered technic of controling the pain. Although each cell of my body was overcomed with pain... I didn't react. I threw it away from my consciousness.

Sometimes I'm dreaming about throwing away his belt. I don't know if my bottom wouldn't feel ofended by that, but.. My pussy would rather thank me for that. Untill the moment my Owner didn't use it on Her, I was able to stay calm, next to the pain. That was my limit, I couldn't get out of myself anymore and sob get out of my mouth, my legs automatically got crossed and I gave up totally. I didn't have any more strenght to pull myself together.

- Spread your legs.
- ....
- Spread. Your. Legs. Now.

When I made myself to open my eyes i and see His look... He gave me the strenght, which I needed. The strenght, which I should have for pull myself together and do what He wanted me to do. I was weeping spasmodically with legs spreaded and I surrended. At least I was submitted to what He prepared for me. That feeling, when you finally stop fighting is... beggare description. Totally depencende and devotion... Mysthic relation...

But the most beautiful is that I know, that He knew that. He felt the moment, when I surrended myself.

- Stop crying. Deep breath. Exhalation. Breath in...Exhalation... Breath in...  Good girl.

And then.. He fucked me. At least at the beggining, cause then He...  was making love with me... And then he let me cry... As loud and stron as I would like. In his strong arms...

- I love you. I'm proud of you, my slave! And because I'm so proud, you won't be punished today.

And when He let me go to clean myself ( I don't know why, but I went out of water so.. tottery that I couldn't keep my muscles calm) he wrapped me in the quilt and made tea for me.. And a bun.. With ham and cucumber.

And when I cuddled to his arm I was apologizing to my Master... For bad attitude and behaviour... For I didn't do like a Slave...

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